The Beat Of My Heart

SAVE OFFLINE

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

Touch my skin, and tell me what you’re thinking Take my hand and show me where we’re going Lie down next to me, look into my eyes and tell me, oh tell me what you’re seeing. So sit on top of the world and tell me how you’re feeling What you feel now is what I feel for you Take my hand and if I’m lying to you I’ll always be alone If I’m lying to you See my eyes, they carry your reflection Watch my lips and hear the words I’m telling you Give your trust to me and look into my heart and show me, show me what you’re doing So sit on top of the world and tell me how you’re feeling What you feel now is what I feel for you. Take My Hand, Dido 1999

Disclaimer: All characters belong to SM. Original plot belongs to this author. No copying please. Many thanks to my beta team, DeJean Smith, Swimom7, Shasta53, and Sparklybabs. This outtake was written especially for the Fandom Fights Tsunami Fundraiser. My thoughts, prayers and love to all affected by this disaster. Vampire, she thought again. Looking at him sprawled on the couch and watching her as though he might pounce upon her, Bella could almost imagine him . . . hunting. Edward patted the small space between himself and the back of the couch, but when she reached him, she pressed against his chest. She

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

knew that she couldn’t push him, but he moved where she wanted him to anyway. When he was lying on his back, she straddled him and lowered her body over his. She rested her hands over his chest and then leaned her chin against her hands so that she could see his face. He was shaking his head at her in either disbelief or amazement. “What are you shaking your head at?” she asked, her voice low. Edward’s breath fanned over her face making her eyes flutter. “Your reactions are a little off, you know,” he teased. “Most people would hear the word vampire and bolt.” “You’re not that scary, Mr. Masen,” she said, attempting to sound brave. “You don’t even have fangs. What kind of vampire are you anyway?” “Not that scary?” He spoke quickly, a growl building in his chest. As always, the sound aroused Bella, turning her insides to jelly and making her want to rip his sweater off so that she could feel the growl reverberating against her bare hands. Before she realized that he had moved, she was in the air, and he was moving over her. She was lying on her back, her hands on his shoulder and his lips millimeters from her neck. It was insane, but the thought of Edward’s teeth inches from her pulse point sent desire throbbing through her veins. Lovely, she thought maniacally, now you want the vampire to bite you. Very wise. “You know, it isn’t very smart to tease the vampire, love,” he purred, driving her already overheated body into a frenzy. “I may feel the need to prove how scary I can be.” “Perhaps this is further evidence of my insanity,” Bella panted, “but that really turned me on.” Edward ran his nose up the length of her neck, making her giggle as his cool skin grazed her. When he darted his tongue out and pressed it against the soft skin behind her ear, she sighed

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

heavily and arched her body up to his. She felt his teeth, covered by his silky lips, capture the lobe of her ear and it ramped her heart rate up through the roof. The things she wanted this man – this not man – to do to her were endless. “Yes, clinically insane,” he said as he settled at her side. “I shall have to keep you here for your own safety.” “And how will you treat me?” She smirked at him, batting her eyelashes coquettishly. She groaned, reaching out for him when he purred in response to her question, but he held his finger up to her lips. “Questions first . . . treatment later.” Edward’s lips brushed gently against hers, and she moaned softly, but nodded when he pulled away. “I do have questions,” she admitted. “Scads of them.” The truth was she didn’t know where to begin. His age, his history, the papers, his diet . . . the last of which scared her to ask him, though she thought it would have to be her first question. She needed to know that more than anything. As she opened her mouth to ask, Edward held up his finger again. “Before you commence questioning, may I say something?” Bella nodded, puzzled at what would cause him to interrupt but eager to hear what he would say. “Thank you. For uncovering my secret and for loving me in spite of it. I never thought . . . couldn’t imagine . . . ever finding anyone who would understand or want me. But you do, and it has made all the difference in the world.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

She wanted to tell him that she would have gone anywhere, done anything just to find out his secret, but he didn’t let her. Instead, he covered her mouth with a gentle kiss that slowly built until Bella’s hands were twined in his hair and they were both breathless. “Knowing that I can do that to you, even now that you know what I am, is more of a gift than you can possibly imagine.” She eased her grip on his hair and ran her fingers through the feather soft strands. He shivered as she swirled her fingers at his hairline. What Bella saw in his golden eyes as she gazed into them was enough to stop her breath. It would have been easy to get lost in that look, overwhelmed with depth of his emotion. Instead, she smiled and accepted it, for once choosing not to question the why or the how. She ran her thumb over his cheek, and he chuckled, breaking the electric connection between them. “So . . . what erroneous vampire legend shall I debunk first? Garlic, holy water, crosses . . . hmm? What would you like to know first?” Bella could tell that he was struggling to keep his voice light, but she heard the underlying fear. Part of her wanted to reach out to him, to reassure him that nothing he could tell her would make her run from him, but she understood his trepidation. Instead of prolonging it, she jumped headfirst into the questioning. “What do you eat?” Her voice came out quickly as she stumbled over the words. “I’m a vampire,” Edward replied evenly. “I drink blood.” Her scientist’s curiosity won out over her worry for his feelings as she cocked her head to the side in confusion.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“Yeah, but what kind? You said something outside that confused me. You said your eyesight helped you locate deer and foxes. The papers that I read only talked about vampires hunting . . . well, humans.” Edward seemed amused by her halting explanation, chuckling as she finished speaking and running a finger through her hair. His touch diffused some of her discomfort, and she relaxed her tense shoulders, waiting for his answer. “I told you I was on a special diet, even for my kind. My fam – Alice and I, consider ourselves vegetarians. We only feed from the blood of animals and abstain from human blood.” Bella did not miss his slip of the tongue, cataloguing the question of family for later. She nodded slowly as she processed the information. Edward’s quiet voice interrupted her thoughts. “You told me you never considered me a monster,” he said. “What did you think I ate if not animal blood?” How did she answer this without offending him? She’d barely had enough time to process the word vampire and relate it to the man she was in love with; she hadn’t gone about exploring the moral implications of his diet. She’d just . . . accepted. “Remember, I haven’t had long to digest this,” she cautioned him, “but I just assumed you drank from humans. But it never occurred to me think of you as a killer. I just thought . . . well, I thought you got around it somehow.” She let her hand fall heavily onto her lap, knowing that her explanation fell far short of explaining her bold declaration that she never considered him a monster. She just couldn’t picture the beautiful, gentle man who cradled her gently as she slept ripping into people’s throats and draining their blood. She shivered involuntarily at the thought. “Got around it? Did you think I was a regular visitor to the blood bank?”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

Bella frowned at his mocking tone and slapped his shoulder, hard enough to make her hand sting. He seemed unaffected by the blow. “I said I haven’t had long to think about it, and I’m not trying to insinuate that I’m not thrilled you don’t dine on humans.” She shuddered again, unwillingly, and noticed that he had seen it. She tried to think quickly, to find some way to make it okay. “I guess . . . well, I guessed that your ability to read minds played into it. I thought, perhaps, that you culled your – victims – from the baser section of society.” Edward’s eyes seemed to bore into her, in either shock or amazement. At first, she felt uncomfortable because he was looking at her so intently. Then, she began to feel what could only be described as pressure on her mind. It felt as though something was nudging against her temple. She gasped softly as she realized she was feeling Edward’s gift. Thankful that he couldn’t see into her mind, she squirmed uncomfortably. “What?” she asked uncomfortably. As soon as she spoke, the pressure faded. “What are you thinking?” “It’s just sometimes you say things, and I wonder if you can’t see into my mind. When I was younger, well, a younger vampire . . . I tried that from time to time. If I read base thoughts in someone’s mind, I would take it upon myself to rid society of the criminal. It was my excuse for giving into my desire for human blood, but I haven’t done that in cen – many years.” Another slip of the tongue, but this one Bella could not ignore. “How old are you?” she asked. Edward’s cool fingers ran over her heated face, and she searched his face, looking for signs that he was displeased or uncomfortable with her line of questioning. “Twenty-nine,” he answered firmly.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“Wait . . . you’re the same age as me?” Bella asked. Bella’s mind worked around the numbers, but even in her heart she’d known before that this man – this being – was far older than her twenty-nine years. “Physically, yes,” he murmured. Bella’s eyes widened and then her brows knitted again as she geared herself up to ask the question that needed to be answered. “How long have you been twenty-nine?” “Four hundred and seventy-five years.” Again, Bella was left speechless and unable to breathe. He’d been on this earth, walking, talking, breathing, for over five hundred years. She ran her hands over his face, looking at him the way she might look at a precious document. He had walked through history, and he was lying with her. It was too much to take in. “Are you looking for signs of aging?” If possible, Edward appeared nervous, laughing as he spoke. “You won’t find any . . . I don’t – can’t age.” “Shh,” she said, trying to calm him. “I can’t even fathom how long you’ve walked this earth.” “Oh, come now. Surely you’ve dated documents older than me,” he whispered, his eyes searching hers. “I can’t be that decrepit.” “Hush,” she scolded. “You’re perfect and you know that. That’s not what I mean. The things you’ve seen, the history you’ve lived through . . . I must seem so provincial in light of all of that.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

Bella continued to trace the lines of his face with her fingertips, brushing the skin under his eyes and trailing down until she reached his lips. Edward moved so quickly that she couldn’t see him kiss each of her fingers, but she felt every burning kiss upon her skin. “I’ve seen kings and princes fall, countries absorbed, and wars end, but you are the most amazing thing I have ever laid eyes on.” A thought occurred to Bella and it made her blush, looking down in shame. She wanted to ask him how he’d spent the last 500 years, but it seemed silly in light of his prior declarations of love for her. He was with her, revealing secrets he’d kept to himself for centuries. It should be enough . . . and yet, it wasn’t. She wanted to know if he had loved before. “I hate not knowing what you’re thinking,” Edward whispered, his fingers gentle on her forehead as though he was probing at the veil between their minds. “It’s silly,” Bella said, her voice rushed as she tried to hide her curiosity from him. “Unimportant, really.” “Nothing you want to know is unimportant,” he replied. “You can ask me anything without fear of judgment, and I’ll answer you honestly. I have no secrets left to hide from you.” Really? she thought. Will you feel the same when I ask of your former loves? She knew her questions would plague her until she got an answer, so she plunged forward. “Were you always – alone? I mean . . . am I . . .” “Shh.” His voice was a soft wisp of air and though it was meant to calm her, it sent her heart racing. She felt the tears welling up in her eyes, and she willingly let him pull her to his chest, burying her hot face against his cool body.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled into the fabric of his sweater. “I told you it was silly. You’re with me now and that’s all that matters.” “It’s not silly for you to wonder,” he replied. “I wonder about your past, and God knows mine is longer than yours. I had a wife when I was human. Her name was Victoria, and she died in childbirth two years after we were married.” Bella felt as though she had been punched. He’d had a family as a human. A wife, whose bed he had shared and whose body he had . . . She couldn’t go on. She felt the bile of jealousy rise in her throat as she forced out the next words. “You had . . . a family.” “No, I had a wife. My child died along with its mother; I didn’t even know its gender. Times were very different then. We didn’t marry because we loved each other. I mourned her and the child, but it was a duty. It wasn’t love. In over 500 years, you are the first woman I have loved.” She let out the breath she had been holding in a long shuddering sigh. He loved her. Hearing those words again was like a balm to the hot jealousy that continued to pulse through her veins. It was silly. Whoever this woman, Victoria, was, she had been dead for over 475 years. It was preposterous to be jealous of her, and yet Bella wanted to run through time and scream in the woman’s face that Edward loved her. She felt like a child. “Tell me about her?” Bella’s voice was thick with the tears she was attempting to hold back, but she felt she owed it to Edward, and the memory of his wife, to know about her. “I don’t remember her.” Childish though it was, Bella said a silent prayer of thanks. “I remember that her hair was fiery red and that she had a sweet smile, but I can’t remember her voice or whether we were happy.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

Bella’s eyes flitted to Edward’s bronze hair, and she wondered . . . what would the babe have looked like? Would he or she have favored Edward or his faceless wife with the sweet smile? Either way, Bella thought the child would have been heartbreakingly beautiful, and she found herself able to mourn the two lost lives . . . and to give thanks for the good fortune of having Edward in her arms. “Well, 475 years is a long time. That’s a lot of memories.” “I remember every one of my immortal years with perfect clarity. Human memories are different. We can save some of them, if we hold onto them in our first years. I didn’t hold onto Victoria. I know that must sound heartless, but it is what it is.” She was glad that he hadn’t held onto her; it would have made it worse in so many ways if he had mourned her enough to hold her memory with him. As it was, she was part of the distant past, and she would remain there. But there were so many other things Bella wanted to know. “I want to know everything,” she said fervently, “even the things you think are mundane or you think I won’t understand. Tell me about how you knew the Cullens. Has it always been just you and Alice, or were there others? Who wrote the letters? Edward, I want to know it all.” Edward seemed amused by her questions and shook his head. “My past is a tangled web of stories, but it is all linked to the Cullens. Carlisle Cullen, the patriarch of that family, was my creator. My father, if you will.” “If you knew them, why have me examine the documents?” “They’re gone, Bella.” There were no tears in his eyes, but his voice broke as though the words cut him to his very core. She could only imagine what would be enough to tear at him in such a way.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“Gone? Your kind can … die?” “We can be destroyed, but that isn’t what happened to them. They’re still alive, but they’ve been taken by another set of vampires. Their memories of us have been erased. For them, it is as though we never existed. They took our foster parents, our siblings and . . . Alice’s mate.” The word mate seemed foreign to Bella. She’d heard of it in reference to animals who mated for life. She thought, perhaps, it was something like marriage. “Alice’s . . . oh! Is that like her husband?” Edward was silent for a few moments as he thought over his answer, and Bella felt her pulse pick up as she waited for him to reply. “You could say that, though marriage is a human construct with human limitations. When a vampire mates, it is for life . . . which for us is eternity.” Bella felt warm all over. Immediately, she wanted to know if that is what he felt for her, if he wanted her for an eternity. But instead of asking him that, and risking rejection, she focused on Alice. “That is awful for Alice,” Bella whispered, averting her eyes from his. “I can’t imagine the pain she must be in. How long?” “They were taken twenty years ago. We haven’t seen them since.” Bella drew in a deep breath and plunged ahead, hoping she already knew the answer to her next question. “And . . . you didn’t have a . . . mate?” She bit her lip in anticipation and dropped her eyes. There was a small thread on his sweater that she worried with her fingers as she waited. Edward’s icy touch on her chin drew her out of her own thoughts, and she lifted her face, looking into his smoldering eyes.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“No, you are the only woman who has ever held my heart, dead though it may be.” Dead? She thought, placing her hand over his chest. She waited, breath held and head cocked to the side in frustration. Hadn’t she touched his chest before? How had she not noticed the silence there? How had she not noticed the lack of . . . anything? Edward reached over to her hand and lifted it, resting it over her own racing heart. “It beats here now.” His voice held the weight of a solemn promise, and Bella’s mind was clouded with thoughts of forever. She knew that this was the moment to ask him what her heart had wanted to know from the moment he mentioned the word “mate.” “Am I your mate, Edward?” “I can’t . . . It is not up to me. For me, there is no other; there never will be. You are my heart and my life now.” Though she should have been happy to hear that there would never be another for him, she was angry. How could he not know what she felt for him? “How can you even doubt that I feel the same?” Her voice rose in anger as she spoke, shaking her head. “I’m lying here next to a vampire talking about your vampire family that has been stolen from you by—wait for it—other vampires. Jesus, Edward, I’m not running away from you. That should stand for something!” “Please don’t be angry. I don’t doubt your feelings,” he explained. “But I won’t make decisions for you or place terms on your feelings that you don’t fully understand. Yes, I consider you my mate. But I would never presume to say that you feel the same.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

It hadn’t occurred to Bella that Edward might feel doubt as well. He wanted her forever, his forever, but he wasn’t willing to place his terms on her. It was up to her explain her feelings to him. “I do,” she whispered with feeling. “I might be unable to fathom an eternity the way that you can, but I can’t imagine one second of my life without you in it.” Edward’s breath came out in a sob of emotion as he kissed her. He didn’t hold back as he normally did, instead moving over top of her and pressing his body down against hers. She couldn’t get enough of feeling him against her body. Bella wrapped her arms around him and tried pulling him down harder against her, but he resisted, slowing down their kiss and easing away from her. Something inside of Bella snapped, and she growled, grabbing his hair harshly in her hands. “No!” she cried, looking deeply into his eyes. “Don’t pull away from me. Not now . . . not tonight.” Edward moaned as he slipped his cool fingers under her shirt and felt along her ribs. She pulled his tongue into her mouth, wanting as much of him as he would give to her. When his lips moved down her neck and over her collarbone, Bella tightened her fingers around his neck, wanting him to kiss her harder. His lips hovered near her ear, and Bella moaned softly. “Tell me what you want.” His voice was a low growl that made Bella move against him in frustration. Couldn’t he feel what he was doing to her, how much she wanted him? “Make love to me,” she panted, arching her body up to meet his. “We’ve both wanted this from the moment we met. And now . . . there’s nothing stopping us. I know . . . and I still want you. I need you. And I love you.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

He pressed his hardness against her center, and she groaned, wrapping her leg around his hip to bring him even closer. “I’m afraid.” His voice was a pained whisper. Bella chuckled as he looked down at her, not understanding what he was saying. “What could a vampire be afraid of?” she asked, still laughing. “Breaking you,” he replied. “I can’t just turn the strength off, and it’s remarkably difficult to remember you aren’t indestructible when you’re writhing beneath me like that.” His voice was desperate and he brought his lips crashing against hers as hard as he would allow himself, rocking against her as he did. Bella could feel how much he wanted her and knew that the question of his control made him unable to give in to his desire. She pulled away from him and gently caressed his face. “You told me yourself,” she whispered. “You could never harm me. Love me, Edward. It’s the right time.” Edward’s kiss was different, deeper and freer than he had ever kissed her before. Bella felt the tight bands of his control breaking as he let himself give into her. She was up and moving through the air in his arms before she realized what was happening. He flashed across the room toward the fireplace and laid her gently on the thick rug that covered the stone floor. “What . . .” “I told you before, when I had you it would be perfect. I want you in front of the fire.” His words lit a fire of desire within her. She moved to reach out for him, but he was gone in a flash of blurring speed. Her eyes raced to keep up with him as he moved around the room. In less than a second he was in front of her again, scattering the rug with plush pillows and kneeling by her side.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“It’s really more freeing than I could have imagined being able to be myself in front of you.” Bella sighed and smiled, reaching out for him with shaking fingers. “I don’t want you to have to hide from me anymore,” she whispered. “We’re together . . . nothing is going to change that.” When his lips met hers, she cried out and arched her body up to meet his. His fingers played for a moment at the hem of her shirt before she heard a ripping sound. She gasped as she looked down at herself, her shirt torn wide open. “So . . . that was hot . . . but I don’t have a change of clothes.” She laughed nervously as she spoke, caught somewhere between excitement and surprise. His fingers trailed his icy touch up her body, stopping quickly at her bra to snap it open. His laughter sent shivers throughout her body. “Maybe I don’t like you wearing clothes.” His voice was full of dark desire and it made Bella realize who and what she was playing with. She wasn’t frightened of him, but the danger of his nature thrilled her. And the fact that he didn’t feel the need to hide that from her made it even more exciting. Still, she was going to need clothes. Just as she was about to open her mouth, he captured the already hardened peak of her nipple between his lips. She cried out as he circled it with his tongue. “Maybe not,” she gasped, trying to remain rational. “But Alice might. Like me wearing clothes, that is.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

Edward growled, sending a jolt of desire straight through her, and released her breast. He looked down at her with his dark eyes burning in the firelight, and she almost tore off the rest of her clothes herself. “Alice brought all of your clothes from the hotel to our home earlier this evening.” Edward lowered his head as though ready to return to her breast, but she placed her hand in the middle of his chest to stop him. She didn’t understand how Alice would have gotten her clothes or why. “Psychic, remember? She saw you needing them. Now can we please stop talking about my sister while I’m trying to fuck you?” Bella was convinced there was nothing sexier than the sound of Edward’s soft British accent caressing the word fuck. She groaned as she fisted his sweater, pulling wildly at him to get his mouth back on hers. When his lips were on top of hers, she kissed him as hard as she could, moaning into his mouth. He pulled away with a chuckle, and she lay back, panting beneath him. “You liked that? I thought it was rather crass, but . . .” “Crass, maybe,” she harshly, “but a definite turn on. Now . . . follow through.” It was possibly wrong, but at the moment it was exactly what she wanted. She wanted him to tear the rest of her clothes off of her body and fuck her . . . hard. Of course, she also wanted him to love her gently all night long. She wanted it all. Bella grunted in frustration as she tried to pull his sweater off of his body. He smiled at her, pulling it off carefully and throwing it on the couch. “I’m glad you didn’t rip that one,” Bella said as she let her fingers play up his stomach. “I rather like that color green next to your hair.” Edward looked stunned, and laughed in surprise at her words.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“What? What’s funny?” “Nothing.” His voice was distracted at he ran his fingers over her shoulder, helping her out of her ripped shirt and bra. “It’s just . . . well, when I was human, my eyes were that color.” She looked at him for only moment before nodding and smiling. “I can see that,” she whispered kneeling in front of him, “but I love your eyes now. They speak volumes to me.” And they did. As she looked at him, she could tell how hungry he was for her body. He wanted to lay her down and bury himself within her. She could see it clearly in the predatory look haunting his face. But he held back, as he always would, because she was fragile. In order for him to let go and love her, she would have to take control. Bella wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her breasts against his cool chest and hissing at the way his skin felt against hers. He ran his fingers lightly down her back, and she arched herself even closer to him, crying out as he swirled his fingers at the base of her spine. “I need to ask you something,” he whispered, his voice hesitant as he pulled away from her. “Anything,” she replied. He smiled and laid his hand over her heart. Bella began to worry about his question when he hesitated, wondering what he could be concerned about. “I need to know if you’ve been intimate with anyone else before,” he said softly. “I’m not asking because of . . . jealousy. I need to know if there is a chance you’ll bleed.” Bella could see the embarrassment on his face even though it was impossible for him to blush. She hated that it was uncomfortable for him and immediately wanted to ease his fear.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“Shh,” she soothed him. “I’m not a virgin. And . . . you’re allowed to be jealous. I mean, I kind of want you to be. I want all of you, and I’m not embarrassed about being jealous of a woman who died almost five hundred years ago. My history is much more recent. And . . . I wish I didn’t have those memories.” Even if it would have been more difficult for him, she wished that she could have given him that gift. The men who came before, what few there were, were nothing compared to him. An angry look crossed Edward’s face for just a moment before it faded, and immediately Bella wondered what he had thought. Before she could ask, he pulled her closer to him and sighed. “I haven’t been alone for five hundred years,” he murmured, his lips brushing her forehead as he spoke. “You were honest with me. I owe you the same. There have been other . . . women. Not humans, but . . . well . . .” Pain. Like a sharp knife through her heart, ripped through her as she thought of him with anyone else. She breathed through it, and when she could, she spoke. “Can we agree that whatever happened before we met is past and doesn’t matter?” she asked, hoping her voice didn’t betray the momentary pain she had felt. “I appreciate your honestly. It means so much to me . . . but I don’t want to know about anyone else. I’m glad to know you weren’t completely alone, but I don’t want to picture you with anyone else. I just want you all to myself.” The truth was she was glad that he had found comfort in someone. The thought of him being completely alone for 500 years was horrifying and to know that at least there was someone, or several someones, who helped keep the loneliness at bay, eased her worry for him. But now that they were together, she wanted to never think of whoever those people, or creatures, might have been. He was hers; she didn’t want to share.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

Edward bent his face to hers and kissed her sweetly, almost reverently, and she could feel his promise to her in his kiss. She returned his kiss with as much love as she could give him, taking his tongue into her mouth and running her fingers lightly up his chest. For the first time while they kissed, she noticed the absence of his heartbeat, and it troubled her. She pressed her body against his, lending her thundering pulse to him. She wondered if he could feel it, or if his stone skin just absorbed it without even noticing. Again, her fingers were in his silken hair. She felt him begin to purr as she ran her fingers through the strands. “God, Bella,” he groaned as her fingers moved more firmly. “I love it when you do that.” She tugged a bit harder on his hair, and he cried out, gripping her hips in his hands and moving his body against hers. She searched his scalp with her fingertips, pulling and tugging as she went. “That?” she asked, her voice rough as she tugged again. “You like when I pull your hair?” He kissed her desperately and panted into her mouth. “Yes,” he growled, his voice harsh and needy. “Harder.” She swallowed her instinctual fear of hurting him and pulled with all her might. She let the power she felt show on her face, urging him with her hands to tilt his head back. His neck was long and pale and open to her. She nipped at his throat with her teeth, not gaining any purchase on his skin, but seeming to drive him crazy. Bella clawed her fingers across his shoulders and moved her mouth up to his ear. “What do you want, Edward?” she purred, licking at his ear as she spoke. “Hmm? Tell me how you want me.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

He moved quickly as she thought he might, flipping her onto her back and ripping her jeans from her body. He moved his hands to her underwear, pausing for only a second before tearing them away as well. She looked up at him through lowered lashes and smiled. “We’re going to go through a lot of clothes if you can’t stop yourself from ripping all of mine.” She leaned up on her elbows and reached out for the waistband of his khakis. “Off,” she said harshly. She smiled as he complied quickly, kneeling before her, naked in under a second. “You never answered me,” she whispered. “What do you want?” He bent over her, and his breath fanned over her hot skin, making her moan. As his tongue darted out to taste her collarbone, she writhed under him, wanting to feel his body meet hers. “I want . . . to fuck you,” he whispered, his voice thick with desire. Bella moaned and clawed at his back, trying to pull him down to her. His tongue made a clicking sound, and he shook his head slowly. “I want to make love to you. I want everything. Now that you know how long I’ve been waiting for you, perhaps you can understand that I may never be sated.” “Now,” she groaned. “I need you inside me.” She couldn’t wait another second to feel him filling her, and Edward didn’t make her wait. He slipped inside of her, his cool, hard member moving slowly within her heat. She heard him moan her name, and it sounded like a prayer, whispered as he continued to press into her. When he filled her completely, and she felt him settle within her, she lifted her legs and wrapped

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

them around his back, pulling him even deeper still. Nothing had ever made her feel more content than having him inside of her. She looked up at him with all of the love she felt for him. “We were meant to be together,” she whispered. “Make love to me, Edward.” His movements were slow, restrained, but they sent shockwaves through Bella. Every inch of him moving in her seemed to bring her closer to the edge. She tightened and loosened around him, savoring the feel of his thrusts. As they moved, she didn’t even notice the difference in their temperature any longer. They were the same, and he felt perfect. Bella wanted to feel him buried within her, moving and teasing and owning her, throughout the night. But she was already close to falling over the edge. Her hips bucked erratically against him. Edward shifted, kneeling upright and supporting her back with his hand as he trailed his other hand over her body. He could move more solidly within her in this new position, and Bella could feel her orgasm coiling within her stomach. “God, you’re beautiful,” Edward murmured, looking down at their bodies. He brushed her nipple, making her cry out and move harder against him. She groaned and bit her lip as he continued to move rhythmically. “More,” she panted. “God, I’m so close, Edward.” He trailed his fingers down to her opening and moved inside her folds. She bucked against him, and he closed his eyes in concentration, swirling his finger steadily as he continued to thrust within her. He found her clit, circling it as he thrust, and it was exactly enough. She screamed as she came, fisting her hair in her hand. Edward stilled immediately, and she almost begged him to keep going, but she didn’t have to. After only a second, he moved his fingers again, making her groan in pleasure. “Harder,” she whispered. “You can go harder.”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

She knew he wouldn’t allow himself to move harder without her direction, and she wanted to give this to him. She wanted to show him that she could be in control too; she’d never let him fall. He moved his hands so that they gripped her hips, and he thrust, harder. It sent shockwaves through her body, pleasant and warm echoes of her climax. Bella moved with him, encouraging him to continue thrusting harder until she felt the first twinge of pain. She told him to back down just slightly, and he did immediately. The pleasure was overwhelming, and Bella felt another orgasm building as his fingers pressed into her hips, and his cock thrust within her. “Edward!” she cried as the pleasure uncoiled within her. “Let go.” With another swift thrust, he came, roaring her name.

Edward lay between her and the fire, but Bella was still perspiring from the heat and from the exertion. She was pleasantly spent, happy and sated from love. Still . . . she wanted him again. As he had said before, she didn’t think she would ever be completely sated. Edward’s fingers trailed over her body in amazement until he reached her hips. He sighed as he fingered something, and Bella felt just a slight twinge. “What?” she asked, her voice thick and sleepy. “I – bruised you. It will leave marks.” Bella looked down at her hips and shrugged, running her hands over the tiny bruises. “I’ve gotten worse banging my shin on the foot of the bed,” she said. “Besides . . . I kind of like it.” “Mmm.” Edward brushed his lips against her forehead as he spoke. “Is this more evidence of your insanity?”

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

She laughed as she rolled over to face him, looking at him sternly. “No, I’m serious. I like that there’s a mark of yours on me. It’s like you claiming me.” “I don’t like hurting you,” he replied stubbornly. “It didn’t hurt,” she insisted. “Or, if it did, it was so lost in the good feelings that I never even noticed. Edward, they’re ten tiny bruises. Can’t you just enjoy the fact that we just made love . . . you know, without you killing me?” She chuckled again, and she watched the smile spread across Edward’s face slowly. “How can you be so cavalier about that?” he asked, his tone betraying his near horror at her words. “Oh, be serious, Edward. There was never any danger, was there? I just wanted to point out how ridiculous you were being over a few bruises.” He sighed as he shook his head. “You’ve known my secret for less than a day, and already you are talking me down from ledges. Your mind is fascinating,” he whispered. “It makes me wonder . . .” Edward seemed to cut himself off, shaking his head angrily and sealing his lips. “What? What does it make you wonder?” “Nothing.” His voice was terse and his eyes flashed up to hers in warning. “Nothing important.” “It’s all important,” she replied, ignoring the look in his eyes. “What does it make you wonder?” He sighed in defeat and closed his eyes, exhaling slowly.

The Beat of My Heart: A TFP Outtake for Fandom Fights Tsunami Author: javamomma0921

“I promised you honesty,” Edward said. “Your mind makes dizzying jumps and puzzles out the most intricate problems so effortlessly. It makes me wonder . . . what your mind would be like – if you were like me.” And the seed was planted.