bury my heart next to yours

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Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://download.archiveofourown.org/works/10850742. Rating: Archive Warning: Category: Fandom: Relationship: Character: Additional Tags: Stats:

General Audiences No Archive Warnings Apply M/M SKAM (TV) Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen Even Bech Næsheim, Isak Valtersen Symbolism, Fluff, Beaches, Boys In Love, Self-Acceptance, lots of kisses Published: 2017-05-08 Words: 1635

bury my heart next to yours by thekardemomme Summary

“Verdens Ende (English: World's End, or more figuratively, The End of the Earth) lies at the southern tip of Tjøme Island, and has for years been visited by tourists. Ironically enough, it is not really the end of the world in any sense, but when one stands there and looks out across the vast area of ocean one can forget about the geography and really feel like there is nothing else out there. (from wikipedia)”

Notes

thank you to katiekat99 for the prompt!!! I enjoyed writing it, I hoped it's what you wanted?? :/ title from ghosts that we knew by mumford & sons

See the end of the work for more notes

Even takes a deep breath, breathes the salt and the wind and the cool air. It's a relatively warm day but the wind makes it chilly, and Isak hugs his jacket a bit tighter around his body. Even wraps his arm around Isak's shoulders and tugs him into his side, running his hands up and down Isak's arm to warm him up. “Tjøme is nice,” Isak says, looking out over the water. The wind is making the waves a bit rough, and the sound of them crashing against the rocks and rolling back out is melodic, like a siren song.

“No land mines though, right?” Even laughs, and it almost gets lost in the whipping gale. “No, no land mines. And no aluminum legs.” He rubs his hand up Isak's arm again, and Isak rests his head on Even's shoulder. Isak turns away from the sea, looks at the structure of rocks and cobblestones next to them. Even follows his gaze. “I'm guessing this is a lighthouse?” Isak says, almost like a question. Even nods in affirmation. “Probably not a very useful one.” “That's a tipping lantern,” Even explains. “They used them in 18th century Denmark. They'd light a basket of wood or coal and let it burn as the beacon. This is all just a replica, though.” “Oh.” Isak walks towards the lighthouse, gently runs a finger across the weather eroded stone. He turns back to Even. “I can't imagine wanting to be in this lighthouse. It's got to be freezing in there.” Even smiles. “I'd be there to warm you up.” “18th century Denmark?” Isak sighs, stepping closer to Even and wrapping his arms around his neck. Even responds quickly, encircling his around Isak's waist. “I'd think they'd persecute us for homosexuality first. After all, homosexuality in Denmark wasn't legalized until 1933. Now they've got some of the most extensive rights for LGBTQ+.” Even raises his eyebrows, and presses a kiss to Isak's nose. “How do you know so much about that?” “I was closeted for a long time, Even. I did all the research about it that I could.” They both laugh, and Isak nudges his nose against Even's. Even easily grants what he knows Isak is asking for, pressing a light kiss to Isak's lips. It's chaste, and their lips are slightly chapped from the wind, but the smile on Isak's face when they pull away is blinding. Isak laces their fingers together as they walk down towards the water. The waves aren't as bad closer to shore, so they manage to get out on the rocks and only be affected by a slight spray every now and again. Isak lays out almost immediately after Even puts down a blanket, and Even quickly joins him. It doesn't take long for Isak to end up tucked into Even's side, his face on Even's ribs and their legs intertwined. “The first time I came to Verdens Ende was the summer after I failed my third year at Elvebakken,” he says quietly. He thinks Isak doesn't hear him at first, because for a long time, his only response is the repetitive sound of the pounding surf. But when he looks down to make sure Isak is at least awake, he's met with curious green eyes looking up at him, waiting for him to elaborate more. “I came up here with...with Sonja. So she really did travel to Tjøme, just... You know. No land mines.” Isak scoffs. “What, do you bring all of your conquests here? Is this the final stop to your master plan to get people to fall in love with you? Because it won't work on me,” he teases. Even raises his eyebrows, before laying back down and staring up at the clouds. He can feel Isak still looking at him. “I'm immune to your charms, you know. I can see right through all of your façades and tricks.” “Is that so?” He teases back, and he laughs when he feels Isak nod against his chest. “So be it, then. I guess I've wasted all of this money to get us here.” “Sucks.”

“Mm,” Even hums. They stay quiet for a bit, and the rocking waves almost do put Even to sleep. He forces himself to talk before they both fall asleep out here and get sunburnt. “Sonja and I came up here soon after everything happened. And I remember sitting on the edge of the rocks and looking out at the water and just thinking... this is the end of the world.” Isak shifts so he's laying mostly on top of Even, propping his chin up on Even's chest. Even wraps his arms around Isak's waist, resting them on his lower back. Isak keeps his chin up for a bit before finally laying down, his cheek against Even's heart. “It's not the geographic end of the world, though. That had to be at least a comforting thought,” he says quietly, and Even can't help but smile. Isak was so cute and pure and innocent, or at least, it was easy to believe he was. Despite what Even knows he went through, it's easy to believe that Isak has never been hurt before in times like this. In other times, like when Isak has a panic attack or can't sleep, it's hard to forget he's been hurt before. “In fact, there is no end to the world. You'll just keep going.” “When you're standing on those rocks and staring out at the water, it's really easy to imagine that it is the end.” He runs his fingers along Isak's spine, counting the vertebrae. He can count 17, though he knows there's more, so he associates each vertebrae with something he loves about Isak. “And it felt like it was the end of the world, in the perspective of how my life was going. My life went to shit and I was at the end of the world, physically and mentally. I sat there on those rocks and thought about how I would never get over how I was feeling then, how nothing would ever get better.” “Things have to get bad in order for things to get better again,” Isak murmurs. And Even stills, tilts up to look at Isak. Isak turns to look at Even, smiling slightly. “It's true. If things were just, like, amazing all the time, you'd take it for granted. You'd never truly be able to appreciate the good things in life because everything would be good. There has to be ugly shit for us to appreciate beautiful things. Like there's war for us to appreciate peace, there's rain for us to appreciate sun, there's hate for us to appreciate love.” Isak shrugs, playing with the strings on Even's hoodie. “In an idealistic world, everything would be good all the time. But I'm not sure how realistic that is. Nothing can ever be all good, because then good things don't actually exist. They're just...things.” Even blinks, and pulls Isak up for a kiss. Isak smiles into it but kisses back, cupping Even's cheeks and not complaining when Even slips him just a little bit of tongue. “You're so smart,” Even murmurs when they pull away. Isak dips down for another chaste kiss. “How did I get so lucky to have such a smart boyfriend?” “Because you went through some bad things,” Isak murmurs, running his fingers along Even's features gently. “And now, you're getting better. You're seeing beauty because you saw chaos and decided you didn't want to see that anymore.” They kiss again, slower this time. Even isn't sure how long they lay there, intermittently kissing and just cuddling. It must've been hours, because they end up being there until sunset. They're the only ones in the world at that moment, sitting together at the precipice of the end, getting ready to go back home to Oslo where they'll stand at the threshold of so many beginnings. While Isak packs up the blanket and their shoes and whatever else, Even ventures further out to the edge of the rocks. He looks out at the waves, which had died down in the last few hours; at the swirling tides and the rapid currents. He looks at the end of the world and thinks about how, if he traveled far enough, he'd end up somewhere between Russia and Alaska. That this wasn't the end of the world at all, actually. Not geographically and not mentally. A boat goes by and Even watches it go, watches the wind push at the sails and move it forward. He wonders if that boat had just come out of the stormy surf and was now aiming towards the better part, towards the calm open sea ahead. “Evi!” He hears, and he turns around to see Isak standing a bit further back on the rocks. He's so

beautiful, Even observes. He's tall and he's lanky and his hair has become lighter under the sun and his sleeves are pushed up to his elbows in the way that makes Even's mouth water. He's smiling at Even, possibly even because of Even. “Are you ready to go? The train leaves soon!” Even puts his hands in his pockets and lifts his sunglasses to properly look at the boy, his boy. He's so damn lucky. There's so many good things about Isak, so many that he'd run out of vertebrae before he could even make a dent in the list of them. “Yeah, baby,” he calls back, and starts walking towards him. Isak reaches his hand out when Even gets close enough, and the older boy accepts it and laces their fingers together. He pulls Isak in and presses a sloppy kiss to Isak's cheek, laughing when Isak pretends to complain about it. “I'm ready.”

End Notes

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